Thank You, Creator

As I enter in to my new year, I want to express my gratitude to the One who created me, loved me, saved me and gave me everything. I have nothing to boast of. I am no one to be proud. But my heart is pouring out in gratitude for this gift of life.

I thank God for my family. It may not be perfect. But I thank Him that we're all saved and know him. I thank God for giving me parents who loves me with their discipline. I thank God for my siblings who came to be my close friends.

I thank God for my local church. The love, concern, care and the teachings that I got from these mentors. I thank them for they believed in me and invested in me. I thank them for their trust. I thank them for continually nurturing me. I thank God for the opportunity to serve Him with my church and the opportunity to grew up in church.

I thank God for this passion for the young people. Though at times, I feel so disappointed with what I am seeing, that there are so many young people who are lost, so many young people who keeps on finding true love, left and right, and being end up with the wrong one. I thank God for the opportunity to see; and that He's enabling me to help. I thank Him for placing me a hope that I may believe that this/my generation belongs to Him and we are for His glory.

I thank God that He is molding me. I have so many flaws. I am a sinner. I still sin. But His great love molds me to the person whom He wants me to be; and that He lets me know through His ways that I am wrong. I thank God for I know that He is changing me. I thank Him for His tender discipline.

I thank God for entrusting me the talents that He gave and the opportunity to nurture them. I thank Him for these so I can use them only to worship and give glory to His Name.

I thank God for my friends, that I may not be alone. I thank God for the fun and hurting moments with them. I thank God that I grew up with them.

I thank God for my mentors, that these people are generous enough to share what they know and what they've learned. I thank God that I met them in my life and their wisdom is really something to eat. :))

I thank God that He never let me go. Though there are time that I ran away from Him, but He makes His way to dry me and run back to Him. I thank God for the hunger that I feel and the thirst to keep me going back to Him. I thank Him that I have spent most of my times in His courts.

I thank God for the opportunity to serve others; for enabling me to help and serve others with His love.

I thank God for the circumstances of my life, for the crying moments and sleepless night, For the uber joys and sudden hurts. For I know that He is with me an He's stronger than the winds that could blow me down.

I thank God that I am a Filipino. I believe that Philippines is the apple of God's eye. I know one day that He's going to use the Philippines to impact the world. I thank God for teaching me in my young age to love my country and to be good citizen.

I thank God for the opportunity to disciple, it would be direct or indirect, but I thank Him that He had entrusted me the lives of the young people that He loves.

I thank God for a great love story. Though there are times that I am struggling with my desires as a woman to be feel loved, yet, Jesus lets me feel that I am loved by Him and my well is overflowing.

I thank God for forgiveness. I will always be in debt. I cannot pay him with what I can do. I still have my evil mind with me, my bad attitude and my unforgivable character. But with His blood, I know I am forgiven and with His love, I know He's changing me.

I thank God for giving me a trusted friend who can teach me, guide me and rebuke me all times.

I thank God that He had chosen me. I am undeserved. My mind cannot understand, my brains will never grasp why on earth that He had chosen me - that I am saved now..
But I will always be thankful to Him.

Lastly, I thank God that He created me, that it will never be just existence, but life. I thank Him because He takes in charge. That he always takes my worries off. That he taught me to trust in Him.

Still, there are no words can met the gratitude I have in my heart.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Tag :

Anawangin 2011 - Worst Case Scenario

Last June 18 at 19, nang kasalukuyang taon, kaming magkakabarkada ay nagpunta sa Anawangin Zambales. Sa hindi inaasahang pagkakataon, imbis na nakapagpahinga sana kami ay napagod kami ng husto dahil sa ndi magandang panahon ang sumalubong samin.. pero, masaya, experience na din.







5:30 ang kitaan no'n. Nauna si Leo, sumunod si Nelson, si Gee, si Adriel.. Hanggang sa nagdatingan na isa isa. 7:00 na kami naka-alis ng Cubao (Victory) dahil late ang iba. Akala nga namin ay one hour after pa kami makakaalis dahil bound to Olongapo na ang next trip na hindi naman pala every after one hour umaalis. Swerte lang dahil hindi pa fully loaded ang Wifi bus na may number na 6240.

Eksaktong 11:00 am kami nakarating sa San Antonio. Pagdatind doon ay bumili kami ng bigas, uling at mantika na laging hawak ni Gee. Mineet kami ng aming guide na si Ate Olive na naghihintay na pala sa munisipyo. Naghintay ng kaunti para sa ibang mga kasama hanggang sa sumakay na kami ng tricycle papunta ng Baranggay Pundaquit.

Pagdating doon, sandaling namahinga, hinanda ni Ate Olive ung mga dadalhin namin. Sila na rin ang naghanda ng tubig namin, mga dadalhin katulad ng mga cooking utensils, kutsilyo, kaldero, kawali at iba pa. Nagpasya ang grupo namin na doon na kumain sa kanila para pagdating don, direto happiness na. Kaya pagkatapos, hugas munang plato. Pinagbihis ko na sila, "Pagsakay ng bangka, handa nang mabasa". Hanggang sa tinawag na kami. Okay na ung boat, ndi pa man kami nakakasakay ay may dinaanan na kaming ilog na kumukunekta sa dagat. sobrang lakas ng current. Sumigaw si Allan. sabi tuloy ni AJ, "confirmed". Haha! Isa isang nagpasahan ng gamit. Hanggang sa lahat kami ay nakasakay. Ang lakas ng alon. Tawanan kami sa boat. Masaya. Ang daming alam eh. Ang daming nakikita. Nabasa ung mga gamit namin, pero carry boom lang..







Hanggang sa nakarating na kami sa aming destinasyon, ang Anawangin Cove. Pagdating don, dinala kami ni manong dun sa paglalatagan namin ng aming tent. Ewan ko ba kung bat siya nagdecide nun na doon kami. Pagdating don, siningil na kami ng tig-100 per person para sa overnight stay namin. Pagkatapos, nagset up ng tent.




Naunang nagswimming sina Leah and friends, kumuha kami ng mga kahoy kahoy sa gilid dahil wala nang natirang kahoy para samin. Sugat lang naman inabot namin ni AJ plus nalaglagan kami ng may kalakihang sanga ng puno. Ouch. Para akong nabagok.





Pagbalik don, diretso takbo sa dagat para magenjoy habang sina Leah naman ang nagtuhog ng mga hotdog naming baon na tila isang taong rasyon na halos pinagsawaan nilang lahat, ang kanin naming hindi naubos.




Naenjoy namin ni Ken, Carol at Gee ang lamig ng Fresh Water na ilog. Grabe, ang sarap, ang sarap niyang iuwi sa bahay..



Hanggang sa nakaramdam na kami ng sensitivity na kailangan na naming bumalik sa mga kasama namin at nakiluto't ihaw na. Yummy. Hindi pa man natatapos ang pagluluto at nakakakain ang lahat, biglang umulan, dali dali naman kaming niligpit ang mga tent. Basa sa loob ng tent. Kaya nilipat nila iyon don sa may kubong malapit sa dagat. Lahat ng gamit nandoon habang ung kainan namin ay stay put pa rin. Pagkakain, hindi naman nakafocus ang lahat sa ulam. Puro marshmallow na sinunog ang pinagdiskitahan nila. Kaya busog silang lahat agad.




Pagktapos noon ay nagbanlaw, nagkaniya kaniya na. Naglibot kami ni Gee para lang makahanap ng CR. Doon kami napadpad sa malayong lugar para lang makapagrelease at kami naman ay naging successful. Pagkatapos ng ilang oras ng pahinga't kwentuhan sana. Eto na, lumakas ang ulan, lumakas ang hangin. Likasan kaming lahat. Ondoy daw. Nakistay yung mga gamit namin dun kina Aling Puring, at kami naman nandoon sa may ari ng lutuan. Kumain, umupo, pinilit matulog pero walang nakatulog sa'min. Ay meron pala, sina Carol at Adriel, si C3. Makaktulog lang sana, kaya lang, maingay ung mga boys, tapos ang lamig lamig pa. Alis pa ng alis si Leo dun sa likod ko kaya ayon. Feeling ko, Pneumona abot ko dito.





Hindi pa man gumigising yung araw eh nagluto na kami nila Leah, Manny at Gee. Wala naman kaming maasahang iba kundi mga sarili lang namin. Nagluto para pagdating ng umaga, pwede na sanang lumarga. Pero, ang tagal talagang dumating ng kuya. Sabi nia, 8 daw ay nandoon na siya. Hanggang sa dumating na ung mga naunang guides. Sabi niya, parating na rin daw ung iba. Nakatulog na kami ni Gee don sa tabing dagat. Ung dagat na dapat ay 10 meters away sana ay nakakarating samin.





Anong petsa na nng dumating sina Kuya. Largang larga na kami, dala ang mga pag-asang makakauwi na kami at makakasama ang aming mga pamilya (Drama mode. Change scene). Ngunit hindi pa pala, nagpahinga pa sila, nagkape, sumi-ar, habang kami, atat na atat na kami makauwi. Nang matapos kaming maglakad, saka ko napagtanto kung bakit kailangan pa nilang magpahinga ng ganoon katagal. Grabe. Buti na lang ay nakapagligpit na ang lahat ng gamit.




Nagumpisa kaming maglakad ng 10am. Nagisisi akong tinapon ko ung dala kong tungkod. Sobrang haba ng lakaran. 4 hours ung estimate. Tama naman, 2pm ay nakarating na kami. Hindi biro ung inakyat naming Mt. Maubanban na mayroong 3000+ feet ang taas na siyang 615th highest mountain dito sa Pilipinas.





May mga ilog kaming dinaanan na siyang naging dahilan kung bakit nabasa ung mga gamit namin.
Napakababait ng mga taong nakasabay namin. Tinulungan nila kami ni Gee na umakyat at icheer. Binuhat ni Kuya Bas ung tent ko. (Sa mga makakabasa nito na friends, inimbento ko lang yung pangalan niya, yun kasi yung narinig kong itinawag sa kaniya). Tapos maya maya naman, ung bag ko na. Tinuro niya sakin na kailangan palang nakasecure din ung bag ko sa may bewang para ndi nagwiwiggle. Inabot na kami ng ulan, mas lalong humirap.



Pagdating ko sa taas, biglang sabi ng grupo na bumaba na, walang pahinga pahinga. Nag-Milo pa sila. Grabe. Wala silang awa. Kung ano ung dinulas ng pataas, ganun din ung dinulas sa pagbaba. Tapos, may nakasabay pa ko na sinabi niyang nagugutom na siya, kaya wala akong inisip sa buong 2 oras kundi nagugutom ako. Tinanong ng isang kasama namin kung pano malalaman kung malapit na, sabi ng guide, kapag pantay na raw ang tingin mo sa tao. Mga isa't kalahating oras pa yun. Pagod na pagod na kami. Bawat andar ng paa ay katumbas ng.. wala wala akong maisip na katumbas.




Ang hirap kalaban ng putik. Mainam na kung may madaanang running water para makapaghugas ng paa. Kailangan, madiskarte ka doon, dapat wag ka nang dumaan sa mga trails na dinadaanan nila dahil tyak yon. madulas yon. Kailangan, sa bato ka dadaan at madami pang iba. Hanggang sa dumating na sa point na pantay na nga ang tingin namin sa tao. Akala ko, tapos na. Hindi pa pala, mga 45 minutes pa na lakaran. Nakakapagod. Gutom ang inabot namin. Hindi ko rin naman gustong kumain sa daan dahil makakabigat lamang iyon. Naawa lang ako sa mga kasama kong naglakad dahil sa napigtas sa tsinelas. Pero nakarating naman sila doon ng buhay, kaya thumbs up talaga ako sa kanila.


Pagdating sa bahay nila Ate Olive. Gutom na gutom na kami. Bagsak kami ni Leah sa upuan. Tawa naman ng tawa samin ung pinunong guide namin. Basa lahat ng gamit kaya ayon, karipas sa tindahan, nakidryer. Hanggang sa natapos na ang pag-gayak ng lahat. Uwian na!






Marami akong natutunan sa experience kong iyon.
Una, hindi mo pwedeng pilitin si Papa Lord na payagan ka sa kung anong gusto mo, tapos kapag ndi maganda ang panahon, papa-magic-in mo sa kanya na umayos ang lahat. Moment din yon ng pagdidisiplina Niya sakin.





Pangalawa, natuto akong maging manager.
Pangatlo, May iba't ibang personalidad ang mga tao. May mga tamang tao na dapat isama sa mga tamang lugar. Hindi lahat ng tao ay parepareho ng trip. Hindi lahat gusto ng survival mode. Hindi lahat ng tao, maasahan mong tumulong sayo. Hindi lahat ng tao ay may paki-alam sa kapwa nila. Madalas sa mga panahong uncontrolled, uunahin na nila ang sarili nila. Kahit yung mga gamit nila, iiwan nila para lang sa.. para lang sa iba pa nilang gamit. :))





Higit sa lahat, mula sa experience na ito ay tumaas ang xp level ko. Instant mountaineerer. Parang gusto kong bumili ng bag na pang-camping. haha!!



Hindi ako galit sa Anawangin dahil sinalubong niya ako/kami ng galit siya. Babalik ako don, one day, next year. Ibayong pagplaplano talaga ang kailangan. Tulad ng pagdadala ng plastic at pagplaplastic lahat ng gamit, damit - tuyo man o basa.

Bilang ganti sa mga nakatulong sakin habang nagplaplano ako. Ilalabs ko lahat ng impormasyon na nagamit ko sa internet para makarating lang sa Anawangin.


Expenses:
Ang ambagan namin sa pagkain at misc. ay tig 300 (x12 kami) = 3600.00.
Mula rito ay nakabili na kami ng bigas, uling, mantika, Pork Tunkatsu, kanin na binili namin sa karindirya, cornbeef, hotdog, marshmallows, lighter, 6 loaves na tinapay, 4 na galong tubig (50.00 each), tip sa guide namin, meat loaf, 4 na soap, chizwhiz, cups, kamatis, sibuyas, itlog na pula, styroplates na improvised, bola na panglaro, kutsara, tisyu, at madami pang iba na hindi ko na maiisa isa pa, paluto kina Ate Olive ng kanin nung pagkadating namin dahil hindi na kami makakilos, etc.

Tapos may dagdag na 200 per person ulit para sa boat na back n' fort na sana. Kaya lang, dahil nga boat kami papunta at trekking pabalik ay naiba ung gastos namin.
P150 boat papunta + P100 trekking = P250.00 ang isa.

Ang total na estimated na nagastos bawat isa sa amin ay ay..
P265.00 - Cubao to San Antonio. Victory Liner. WifiReady
P30.00 - San Antonio to Pundaquit. Tryc
P100.00 - Overnight Fee
P30.00 - Pundaquit to San Antonio. Tryc
P44.00 - San Antonio to Olongapo
P207 - Olongapo to Cubao
P500 - Amabagan sa food, boat at trek guide
-----------------------------------------------
P1176.00

Other info:
P250 - rent ng tent for 3 persons
P400 - rent ng tent for 5 persons
P200 - rent ng snorkelling gear
P100 - additional kung gustong magpunta sa Capones at Camara.



Ang guide namin na si Kuya Melvin at Ate Olive. 09065156823. Mabait sila. Halos buong bahay nila ay pinahiram nila sa amin. Sila na rin ang halos nag-ayos ng mga dadalhin namin. Sila ang kinuha kong guide mula sa internet dahil sa kanila yung pinakamura. Pramis!

Number ng Victory liner kung sa'n pwedeng magtanong ng pamasahe ay: 4108986
Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Careless Whisper and the Woman of John 8

Careless Whisper - This is just one of the popular songs in the radio that we often hear. Various artists had revived and still reviving this songs with their own version and rendition

As I found myself singing this song [because of LSS], I just felt like it was talking about the miserable feeling of disobeying to Him or the toxic feeling of sin and being away from Him; and finally to learn that life is in it's best when you are "dancing" with His righteousness.



I'm never gonna dance again

(I never gonna do that again)
Cause guilty feet have got no rhythm
(That living life in mess got no rhythm)
Though it's easy to pretend
(Yes, it's easy to pretend that everything's fine)
I know you're not a fool
(we can't hide anything from Him)

I should have known better than to cheat a friend
(..there's more to life that living life in sin & cheating Him)
And waste the chance that I'd been given
(.. cause we're always taking His grace & forgiveness for granted)
So I'm never gonna dance again the way I danced with you
(So we'ere not going to live like the past instead, we should dance in His way of life)



While reading the lyrics, I remember the story of the woman that had been caught up with a guy, brought to Jesus; and at the end of the story Jesus did not even condemned her for her sins... and yet, the Son of God, whom without sin, said to her, "Go and sin no more".
Thursday, May 19, 2011

47 Rough Drafts

I just want to thank God for the almost 4 years of friendship. 47 months of saya, tawa, gulo, sakitan, away...

I just want to thank God for those years wherein kahit naging narrow ang daan, meron akong kaibigan na nandiyan lagi para sakin.

I want to thank God for every morning I wake up - I know that I have a friend with me.

I want to thank God that sharing Jesus to her is not that hard.

I want to thank God for every circumstances that He had given us - the ups and downs that could shake us... and realizing afterward that the friendship is unshakeable.

I want to thank God for those years na naramdaman kong hindi ako nag-iisa.

I want to thank God dahil Christian na siya at alam kong pinili naman talaga Siya ni Lord para maging anak Niya.

I want to thank God dahil I have someone to look after .. and someone who looks after me..

Magpapasalamat si the One ko sa kaniya One day, dahil- dahil sa inuntog niya ko sa pader.. nagsesettle down na ko para kay the One ngayon pa lang.

I want to thank God dahil merong someone na nagcocorrect sakin.
Taob ako minsan, pero ayos lang.
Tama siya.

I want to thank God that I could express out my heart through a friend who would just stop and listen.. I thank God for giving me a listener.

I want to thank God that I have someone to share my life with - with the rest of my life because alam kong hanggang dulo na 'to!

I want to thank God for this sister, for her life.

I want to thank God because He entrusted me this friend.

I want to thank God sa takbo ng Friendship Story namin - siguro paraan ni Lord na hindi kami naging physically close noon.. letters lang... para ngayon, meron kaming mga binabalikan.. written artifacts.

I want to thank God dahil kahit pasaway ako, emotionally emo, at sobrang maka-react sa GM eh binibigyan niya ng reason itong bestfriend ko to stay.

I want to thank God dahil I can speak my evil mind and wrong intentions to her, then I will realize that it is wrong.


I want to thank God that I know - when we die, we're going to see each other in heaven and we could still enjoy the friendship there.

I want to thank God dahil naging mabilis ang healing ng heart ko nung panahong nafall ako - dahil andiyan siya..

I want to thank God dahil nung may nanakit sakin, meron someone na nakiki-away para sakin..

I want to thank God because she's someone in God's behalf, telling me, when I'm wrong, that I'm wrong.

I want to thank God because I've experience the best adventures of my life with her & though nakakatakot minsan - I will never have to be afraid. haha!

I want to thank God because I love this friend so much and I know that mahal din niya ako. :)

I want to thank God dahil hindi niya ko binigyan ng ate... dahil meron palang someone na magpplace ng lugar na 'yon (kahit ako naman daw ung ate)..

I want to thank God every day that we've been together and learning Him.

I want to thank God that when I feel like crying - I just let the tears out, just be myself and express the emotions.

I want to thank God for this long walk and the walk is never really boring.

I want to thank God for the opportunity to be a influence her.

I want to thank God for teaching her to trust me; even there are times that I failed her;

I want to thank God that I have someone with me to reach dreams even though I don't know my dreams yet. hahha!

I want to thank God that there's someone who taught me of the compassion for the needy ones.
To let me experience the joy of giving to the beggars.

I want to thank God that every time I fail; He's using someone to help me stand.

I want to thank God because I'm gaining wisdom with her.

I want to thank God that he had given me someone - na kahit hindi ako magsalita.. alam niya na yung mga gusto kong ipahiwatig...

I want to thank God that he had given me someone who knows me inside-out.

I want to thank God that he had given me someone who would care enough to give me fruits when I needed them the most. :))

I want to thank God each time I fall. I have someone to help clean my wounds & be healed.

I want to thank God each time I feel the insecurity - I have someone to to remind me that I am more than blessed.

I want to thank God each time I feel afraid, I have someone to remind me that God is there and all I have to do is to pray.

I want to thank God because He knows what exactly I've needed in a friend.

I want to thank God each time na nag-aaway kami - there's reason to forgive & forget..

I want to thank God that walking the Christian life & standing up with my convictions is never hard because there's someone with me - walking the same walk and standing with the same convictions.

I want to thank God that in this life. I'm not walking alone - I'm walking with her. That I could fast phase lessons. I could walk slow. That we can run together. Maybe this life-walk is never easy.. But because I have her with me, it's always fun.

I want to thank God for giving me someone who could accept me for who I am.

I want to thank God for giving me someone whom I could speak my heart out, the joyest of the joys the pain-est of the pains - even they're corny.

I want to thank God for writing my life story with her though I am not deserving to have her..

I want to thank God that the purpose of this friendship is for His glory.

I want to thank God because of this rough draft of life with her.
Friday, February 25, 2011

2010 - The Lord is my Deliverer

2010 has been one of the greatest year for me. Why? I've been through to too many trials, downs, pains; but the Lord is able to deliver me and save me..

12 months ago, I was just a student. As I review my planner, I saw things to do's like finishing OJT files, doing important stuff and alike. I also had my thesis subject and oracle subject on which I wasn't really sure if I'm goin to graduate or not.

Well, our thesis project was chosen to represent our college/department. It wasn't really that easy. We have to do the system ahead of time; and it was just February that time -- to early for us to finish it compared to the regular thesis groups. I cannot forget how much pain and fear it caused me or to the group as well, when our dean keeps on digging us down, saying "Hindi niyo naman yan kaya,.. Itigil niyo na yan".. Those moments are really tiring, hurting and frustrating. We cannot do anything. We're too stuffed to think of something that could make our thesis project unique compared to other existing project. But, with God's grace, we are able to get the 3rd place in the competition.. :D

But, to graduate really did not stop in finishing the thesis project, we have to finish and defend our Oracle System. Along with the thesis project, we have to do the Oracle System in which we poured every single drop of our sweats, tears, headaches and eye bugs. On the day of defense, I was quite of full confidence that we're gonna have a high grade. But, things aren't really in your hands.. We failed to show the system. We had no chance. We're going to fail.

Days have passed. Prayers are on bended knees and cry outs. Until the day came, where in we have to get our grade slips, and for the first time, I got my first 3.0 .. in my oracle subject. I passed. We passed. I'm going to graduate. After 12 days, it was the graduation day. The Lord is really great.

After the graduation, I was a person unemployed and my only identity was of Christ - that I am His.

I have to apply for job. At first, I enjoyed it. I promised God that I will make sure that my job will be free on Saturdays and Sundays. It was getting harder. I felt like that I'm loosing great company's one by one.

In the middle of the road, one day, our school registrar called me at home, saying that she cannot produce my TOR, Certificate of Graduation and Diploma as well because my birth certificate has a wrong gender entry. In stead of female, it was male.

I continued applying for jobs since there are no options. It's no easy. The companies that doesn't require the TOR's and Stuff are call center companies. But I still hold on to what I promised to the Lord and what He promised to me - that He will put me in a company of His will.

One day, I was about to apply in a Japanese Company, but, the traffic was too heavy that I came 15 minutes late so I decided not to go. Instead, I went to another company. I walked from POEA to Greenhills 'cause I thought it wasn't that really far. But, it was about 5 kilometers long. When I got there, the HR asked me of my TOR's and stuff, I told them, I don't have them already. Yet, they still allowed me to take the exam. The exam was so familiar. I've already seen it for the 4th time. The Lord also reminded me of the right answers. I passed the exam and took the exam on the next day. After lunch, I had my interview with the manager and company president. They asked me of my TOR, I told them of my problem, they asked my of my copy of grades, I told them that it was gone because of what happened to Ondoy. They told me that they really require my grades. After the interview, they told me that they're just going to call. I went home, too much frustrated, I cried, "Lord, tele-novela ba 'to? Ilang taon kong pinaghirapan yung pag-aaral ko, tapos eto? wala man lang akong patunay na grumaduate ako? Na pinaghirapan ko iyon lahat?" ... I cried to my mom. So, what she did is that she went to my school and asked the registrar if she could release my documents, though it does contains the wrong entry for my gender. Days had passed, I recieved no calls from any company.

Week after the interview, I recieved a call from that company, they told me that I passed the exam an interview. They'd asked me if I was still free. I was really amazed, how could they accept me if I have no credentials? They'd trust me with what I said? I knew it! The Lord showed that His works knows no rules of men.

Now, I am currently working in the company. I loved the people, though things are not really easy. I met Christian friends and I am growing.

One more thing to testify is that the Lord had delivered me from the pit of my fall. I fell in love with a non Christian. Yeah, I was happy having someone with me, pursuing, caring and I felt loved. But, I fell miserable as I was loosing my Everything. I was disobeying my GOD!! Every night, I found my self lying dead with my soul and spirit. I called on God for help because I can't help my self out. I need a Savior. The Lord saved me. He made a way. Yes it hurt me and the guy, but I know it was for the good and what was good is that we didn't commit in a relationship. I'm still a clean sheet. :D

I really love the way how the Lord delivered me - showing me things that are beyond my understanding, but I really have to obey.
Saturday, January 1, 2011

Rich. Handsome. Famous


I am a wretched girl who by God's grace fell in love with this mighty Savior who had given me my self worth and gave me wisdom saying, "Darling, be careful not to fall for anyone keep your standards high cause you are so dear to Me". So now, I'm making my shortlist of my "Lord, sana ganito siya" (but of course, everything is up to Him)

1) Rich. Yeah! Practically saying that his Father is the provider, creator and owner of all. He simply lives abundantly, for God blesses him as well as his works. He's a good steward of blessings and His heart is no after money, possessions and properties.

2) Handsome. Because he's a showcase of God's goodness and beauty. He knows his identity & he knows to Whom he really belongs. He's gentle, not harsh in words and deeds. He fears the Lord with love and respect. He's humble, not proud. He's a brother to all, respects his sisters-not attempting to steal hearts and emotions before the the Lord; and a good exampe to the younger.

3) Famous. No not him, but he contributes his life for the fame of the Lord's name, for His glory and will. A genuine Christian. He's man enough to step up, take and lead me to Him.

These are the qualities I know, yet may not be sure, I'm looking for in a 'him' so I may found my heart and the people caring for me, again not broken.



***a challenge to thr Christian guys and girls who found themselves reading this. You should know who you are and what you are looking for.
Sunday, November 28, 2010

Apply ka ng apply! - Pointers para sa mga fresh grad

I'm a fresh IT Graduate galing sa isang hindi kilalang paaralan ngunit mahusay naman. I've been searching and applying for months. I have experienced a lot and already gained knowledge from Do's and Don't on applying. Now, I wanna share these things to you. Hope it'll help you.

Know what do you want. Know what do you want to be
If you want to be a programmer, why would you apply for an encoder or TSR position?
--- sayang ang panahon na gugugulin mo sa isang bagay na hindi mo gusto o ndi mo naman pinangarap.. tapos, maiingit ka lang sa ibang tao na tumutupad ng pangarap mo

HR's motto: "Get the Best, Avoid the rest".
Kung ganyan ang motto ng HR, bakit hindi natin gayahin.
Select the Best companies first. Mag-reseach tungkol sa mga feedback ng mga people sa isang certain company. (i.e. Pinoy Exchange) Mahirap kasi na pag-andon ka na, saka naman mag-aalburoto yung kaluluwa mo, tapos, ayaw mo naman pala.
--- sayang ang pamasahe mo, pipirma pirma ka ng kontrata, ayaw mo naman pala!

Maganda na yung kumuha ng konting kaalaman mula sa mga taong nakapagexperience nang magtrabaho doon.. Ofcourse, alam nila lahat, mula sa sweldo, working environment at mga kalarakaran.ˆˆ Kung nakita mo nang maganda ung feedback sa company na yon.. Gorabells ka na! Pero tandaan mong walang perpektong kompanya. Maging contended. Kung elevator lang ng building ang ayaw mo, magiinarte ka pa ba?
--- sayang ang opportunity, sige ka!

Mahirap din ung masyadong maraming company.. Bakit?
Halimbawang nagpunta ako sa isang company para mag-exam, dahil alam kong may iba pang companies sa listahan ko, ang magiging mindset ko ay: "okay lang na ndi ko to mapasa, marami pa namang iba diyan".. hanggang sa nasasayang at nasasayang lahat ng pagkakataon mo sa earth...
--- sayang lang ang pamasahe mo!

Mas masarap na yung umuwi ka, galing exam at may hope kang kasama na schedule mo for next interview or whatever.. kesa naman ung nagpunta ka sa maraming company na pareparehong walang nangyari.

Prepare.
Kilalanin mo ang sarili mo.. ndi maiiwasan ang tanong na "Tell me about yourself".
Wala nang ibang nakakakilala sa sarili mo kundi ikaw. Kung maari, ioutline mo ung speech mo para sa sagot na ito. Kaya rin kasi laging kasama ang "Tell be about yourself" ay dahil dito tinitignan ng HR kung paano mo inoorganize ang thoughts mo. :)

Maghanap ng mga sample exam sa internet at magpractis. Maraming company dito sa Pilipinas ang parepareho ang exam. Harvard Exam at ang Programmer's Aptitude Exam na gnagamit ng __, ___, ___, at ___ :)

Magbasa. Magsearch sa internet ng mag posibleng tanong ng HR.
"Why should we hire you?" , "What's your strengths and weaknesses",etc.

Kailangan din ng self confidence at angas ng loob. Pero wag naman to the point na nagyayabang ka na. Iadmit sa sarili mo na kailangan mo sila para matrain ka pa. Gawin mo ang lahat para magmukhang "BEST". (Tandaan ang motto ng HR). Gumawa ka ng paraan para masabi mong "pag pinakawalan niyo ko, magsisisi kayo. hahahah!!"...

Importanteng ang pagiging mukang professional. Dito nalalaman ng HR na ikaw ay matured na.

Makinig ng mabuti sa sinasabi ng interviewer. Kadalasan, may mga makakalimutan kang mga tanong niya. Huwag kabahan para makapag-isip ng mabuti.

Wala nang mas masarap na feeling kundi ang magkaroon ng Job Offer.
Pag nagkaroon ka na ng isa. Try mong mag-apply sa iba kung may time pa..
Doon ka na pwedeng mag Collect and Select.

Doon, pwede mo nang isaalang alang ang mga bagay tulad ng "Cashunduan", Location, Career Growth at marami pang iba..

Ang pagsasama ng friends ay isang medyo delikadong bagay.
Ang pinaka "nakakatuwang" naranasan ko ay nagsama ako ng 2 mas magaling sakin sa interview ko.. It turned out, na sila pa ung nakaabot sa proceeding procedures. Nagttrabaho na nga ung isa actually, at hindi pa ko nililibre. Lols.

Masaya magsama ng friends. Lalu na dun sa pasahan lang ng resume na lakaran.. Pero dadating din ang time na paunti na lang kayo ng paunti. haha!

At ang pinakamahalaga sa lahat: Pray. Hingin mo kung anong will ni Lord at kung saan ka niya talaga ilalagay. For sure, kung saan man yon ay un ang best para sayo.ˆˆ.

Commit to the Lord everything you do and your plans will succeed. - Proverbs. 16:3
Monday, August 9, 2010

Unemployed Employed


Ilang araw. Ilang buwan.
Napakahirap maghanap ng trabaho.
Nakakasawa na kung minsan.
Nakakapiga ng utak ang mga exam.

Minsan, kakainin nila ang oras mo.
Ipagdadasal mo pero papa-asahin ka lang rin pala.

Sa bawat paguwi mo na wala kang dalang balita.
Maiisip mo kung saan ka nagkamali.
Maiisip mo kung saan ka nagsayang.
O yun bang dapat hindi ka na lang nagpunta o nag-aksaya ng panahon..

Pero habang pinaghihintay ka.
Habang nag-apply ka sa iba't iba...
Sa bawat tanong sayo ng 'Tell be about yourself'
Saka mo marerealize kung ano ba talaga ang gusto mo.
O kung sino ka ngang talaga.

Wag na wag magsasawa.
makakamit mo rin
ang pinakaaasam mong "Job Offer"
Thursday, August 5, 2010

Grow

may mga bagay sa mundo na kailangan nating hintaying sumibol.
ang mga bagay na hindi natin kailangang madaliin.
at kung hihintayin natin ang pagkakataong iyon...
makikita nating ang kagandahan nito

it will be all worth waiting for.

Lifehouse - Blind

I was young
but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless
as he turned around to leave
and still I have the pain I have to carry
a past so deep - that even you could not bury if you tried

after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind

but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go

I would fall asleep
only in hopes of dreaming
that everything would be like it was before
but nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
they disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go


Super LSS. Dedicated eh.
Saturday, June 26, 2010

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